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X wrote: Hi. I know a little bit about EFT and I have used it on myself for various things. However I have a problem I am not sure how to deal with. My erections are starting to be a bit soft. I am no longer able to get a really hard erection. I am only 44 years old and I know men much older them me who can still get very hard erections. I don't want to start using Viagra. Also I have recently started a new relationship and I have premature ejaculation. Can you recommend me things to tap. Naturally I am looking to make my erections really hard again and to stop my premature ejaculation. If you suggest something can you tell me the reminder phrase as well as the main phrase please.
Dear X,
The first thing we must always establish is whether or not we are dealing with a psycho-physical or psychosomatic problem, or a physical health problem. Erection problems can often be symptoms pointing to an underlying health problem, so the first thing to do is to get a check up with a physician to be sure, and this should be done as soon as possible.
If the physician gives you a clear bill of physical health, we can go on to consider the energetic aspects of the problem.
In general I would advise to seek the services of a trained EFT practitioner to investigate the causes and effect and find the right opening statements.
For example, in the case of erection problems it must be established whether this is the case all the time, or whether there is a difference between the hardness of the erection in masturbation or when having sex with a partner, for example.
It also needs to be established when the problem first started in order to ascertain whether either a traumatic event or a period of prolonged stress or significant life changes had an influence on the problem.
EFT works very well but it has to be targeted correctly and finding the right EFT opening statements that go the cause of any problem is one of the big advantages of working with a practitioner who can offer an unbiased second perspective. And two heads are always better than one. (see also http://1-eft.com/eft_three_lines_of_enquiry_pattern.htm )
One thing I would advise always is to consider stress and the greatest source of stress in your life right now. The problems people have, be they erection problems or any other kind of emotional or psycho-physical problem, are always brought to a head by prolonged and or intense stress - and that can be caused by so many different things. Bereavement, illness, accident, misfortune, business failure, losing one's job, or any traumatic experience can cause systemic breakdowns in mind, body and spirit.
To tap EFT for whatever is the greatest source of stress in your life is always a good way in self help.
You can make a list of sources of stress, answering the question,
"What am I most stressed about?" (Or most worried, most frightened, most scared, most angry etc.)
The answers, for example:
- I've lost my job
- I'm getting married in July
- My mother died last year
- I had a heart attack three months ago
- I can't get over my experiences in the army
- I worry about my son
etc. etc. etc. can be converted into straight EFT opening statements/reminder phrases and tapped on, one at a time, working down the list.
Then you make a new list of things that stress you. If things from the first list re-appear, they are simply treated again; other items will disappear after the treatment and will be replaced by different and new stressors that need treatment.
In that way, you remove significant amounts of stress on the one hand, and on the other, each round of EFT is an opportunity to learn something about the causes and effects of how you feel, and to gain insights on the underlying problems of the stress.
So here are my recommendations once more in brief:
1. Get a check up with a physician as soon as possible.
2. When the results are known, work with an EFT practitioner.
3. In self help, reduce stress as much as possible by making lists of your greatest stressors and tapping through them, one at a time.
I hope that helps and I wish you all the very best as well.
Dr Silvia Hartmann
Author, Adventures In EFT
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